So I am back after a long hiatus. I have been a busy beaver doing a lot of things, not all of them important, but enough to keep me somewhat busy. I have been avoiding also a lot of things including my blog. Today I decided that enough was enough, it’s time to get back in the saddle and write. Life is about starting over sometimes and picking up where we left ourselves. Fear can make us avoid what we need to confront. Each day can be an opportunity for new beginnings. I am choosing to just start where I am. Forget about where I wasn’t. It’s not worth it. Cheers to new beginnings and starting anew.
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 310 times in 2014. If it were a cable car, it would take about 5 trips to carry that many people.
Life has become even more busier now that the countdown to Christmas is on. I am trying to remember to keep busy as memories of my mom seep in every once in a while. Only takes a moment and then I am in tears.
I read today that it takes more courage to be broken than it is to be competent. I wonder how true this is. I hope some day that I can look back on these hard days and see how it has served me but for now it really just makes for a difficult time.
Anyway, I listened to a video I found on Facebook tonight that was a version of Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” -Christmas version. If you get a chance, google it (I believe it had something to do with Cloverton TV). It definitely gave me some peace. Hopefully those who are also struggling this holiday season can find peace as well.
Enjoy your coffee tomorrow morning. I still enjoy mine.
A really good article on the language we use when describing a highly sensitive person..
Do you consider yourself to be a “highly sensitive person” or a “person who is highly sensitive”?
Seems like there is no difference between the two, but consider this question posed by someone named “the_singular_anyone” on Reddit:
How much does the term “Highly Sensitive Person” suck?
Much as it makes sense for me, “Highly Sensitive Person” just sounds like “weak-willed,” an overly sensitive pushover.
Whereas “Person with Heightened Sensitivity” both uses Person-First Language, and makes me sound like an X-Man.
Who names these things, anyhow?
I don’t think the term sucks, but this guy makes a good point. The descriptor “highly sensitive person” makes us sound like we need to live in a bubble while “person with heightened sensitivity” makes us seem like we have a superpower.
Language matters. Where you place the sensitivity when describing yourself matters. Where you place the sensitivity in your life matters.
I needed to…
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I was reading a post by fellow blogger Word Dreams about her insecurities on writing even though she has written books that have been published! I guess we all have our own insecurities and decided that I too would join this Insecure Writer’s Support Group. I thought “why not give it a try?” since I have not been blogging lately and my insecurities have overtaken my joy of writing. Continue reading
Courtesy of ap-photographie on Flickr
I was sitting in front of my computer this evening thinking about how it’s been almost a week since I wrote anything. Feeling less than motivated, I did some searching online to find some fuel for thought. It’s funny, whatever I end up enjoying to write about is usually what I thought least about writing. I owe this to my husband and his fondness for superheroes.
He has helped me find the things that I least know about myself. My nerdom, my geekness, my abilities to withstand zombie movies. All these things I hid away or at least tried too.
My masks have been to protect myself from my own fears and showing others my true self. Masks start to wear in time and break down.
Laughing at zombie beavers running after teenagers in a rom-com with hundreds of people was humbling. I could enjoy myself and not feel judged. And my own modern day Superman sitting next to me.
Who is your Superman?
Wouldn’t it be nice if we were all greeted with the same enthusiasm as the dogs in this video? Imagine walking into your workplace and everyone jumping up to say hello? How special and wonderful we would feel knowing we are valued and appreciated.
I write this as it has now been almost two weeks since I left my workplace and have not heard from any of the staff I worked with. I wonder how much value or appreciation exists in a workplace that no one seems to care when one leaves. I am trying not to take it too personally.
I am going to take a lesson from these dogs and great everyone with big smiles today (won’t be providing any face-licking, that’s more in the dog department). Happy Sunday!
As someone who suffers from anxiety and depression, I wanted to share this video with others to highlight what life is like growing up with a mental illness. I have suffered with anxiety and depression since I was a teen. There are days that it can be hard to think about how it has affected my life. I remember my father driving me to university and the night before he was supposed to leave I had a terrible anxiety attack. I decided I didn’t want to stay and I packed everything I just unpacked two days earlier. My father was so disappointed with me he didn’t speak the whole ride home. I couldn’t look him in the eye for a good week. I think of it as my black spot of shame. Of course, there have been my black spots in my past I wish I could erase.
I don’t feel this shameful anymore, but I still suffer from anxiety that keep me from missed opportunities. I am continuing to push the boundaries of shame and hurt. I know I have more to give to this life and that there is more that is waiting for me. Anxiety keeps getting in the way but I keep pushing it aside. There is too much life to live.
For those of you who suffer, I am here with you. Let’s erase this black spots of shame and learn to love ourselves.